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My mother can really piss me off sometimes.....
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From: Sabinus2 | Posted: 12/18/2001 10:33:10 AM | Message Detail
Dude... if my parents gave me free porn, I'd be the best day of my life.. I mean hell it'd save me the trouble of turning on the computer..
From: HardCoreGoof | Posted: 12/18/2001 11:20:15 AM | Message Detail
There's only one way out: just screw that lil French girl or which ever chick.

But then most likely your mom will lose it on you for having sex.
From: Kanyon | Posted: 12/18/2001 11:48:52 AM | Message Detail
0_o This seems like a Jerry Springer episode.
[Insert Sig Here]
From: phileve | Posted: 12/18/2001 12:33:08 PM | Message Detail
Maybe you just need to make it clear to her that you are interested in girls. That needn't involve letting her see you watch the videos. Just... bleh, I don't know. Go to a local burger bar and chat up a girl there. Don't ask me. o_0
"This earnestness can't last forever. Can it?"
AIM: phileveEatsCurry
From: Dr DeGen | Posted: 12/18/2001 1:29:14 PM | Message Detail

Just remember this, dont question your mother on giving you free porn

Mother knows best *thumbs up*

as long as she isnt planning on watching you beat off.....
Babies are quite cheap on the black market(they come in jars $34.00 shipping) - The Hell Boards
From: kirri | Posted: 12/18/2001 2:46:30 PM | Message Detail
as long as she isnt planning on watching you beat off.....

Geez man
From: Lollehloopz1 | Posted: 12/18/2001 2:48:33 PM | Message Detail
hey kirri do you have aim?
Lori is so funny saying this...
From: Jihad | Posted: 12/18/2001 3:16:18 PM | Message Detail
just beat it!
From: diablosdemonP | Posted: 12/18/2001 4:02:06 PM | Message Detail
Kirri have you said anything PROPERLY to you mum or dad about this? Tell you mum you wanna do this kinda thing your own way and in your own time, and tell your dad she`s being abit too "pushy".
As you can see the people here on GameFAQ`s on loving this topic but for the wrong (some funny) reasons.

Good luck
From: Alex00001 | Posted: 12/18/2001 4:30:28 PM | Message Detail
i suppose this could be a prank and i suppose it could not be... just wondering, who would reconize you if you don't go to school? only people at hockey games ect ect.
What I have said in the above paragraph was written especially for you, sir or madam!
From: Icewall42 | Posted: 12/18/2001 5:16:56 PM | Message Detail
I say you should throw the videos away or smash them up good, then straight out tell your mom the problem and to stop pushing that on you.
Shoot the tyopmonkey! -MI4 REAL {MaK}
~PDS Weapons Specialist~ STSOTNHHAY
From: paragon | Posted: 12/18/2001 5:22:16 PM | Message Detail
It is unknown to me why a 17 year old male would turn down free porn ...


It is unknown to me why someone would accept porn FROM THEIR MOTHER.

It is also unknown to me why someone would make the statement I quoted at all.

LL lgh b 'M iffrt. lgh b ' LL h m.
When I save up a little money I'm coming over there to kill you -Narco
From: Cheezmonky X | Posted: 12/18/2001 5:36:05 PM | Message Detail
I'm back now, and your mother is still a creep...

...She thinks she's so ****ing special...

Bah! I couldn't help it! I don't even like Radiohead...
From: Death Sage | Posted: 12/18/2001 5:43:11 PM | Message Detail

Jesus, paragon, it's PORN.

It shouldn't matter that it came from his mother ...

"You don't understand! I go up when i mean to go down!"
~Boutitman talking about non-inverted controls while playing halo (Owned in part by Sheepster)
From: L621 | Posted: 12/18/2001 5:56:11 PM | Message Detail
I'd feel weird if my mom gave me porn and I'm a girl. I can't even imagine what it'd be like if I was a guy or if my dad did it....ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! But it's more than just that. The prostitute and the imagining what you could do to some girl is just sick. Really, you need to ask her to stop. Why do you not go to school? I'm guessing it's because your mom wants to teach you herself and keep you at home. I could be wrong, but if not she definitely has issues. That's not normal behavior. If it was just the home schooling that'd be fine but it sounds like...she just has big problems.
~You're not afraid of the dark are you?~
From: Tub o Fun | Posted: 12/18/2001 6:04:21 PM | Message Detail
Some people are pretty perverted here wanting free porn from their mother and all.
Newark High School: Five Time Consecutive Delaware Division 1 Champion! Can You Dig It? Sucka!
From: JesusChristSuperstar | Posted: 12/18/2001 6:04:57 PM | Message Detail
Oh boo ****ing hoo! "My mommy gave me porno and gives me money to screw prostitutes. She might even buy me some weed to smoke tomorrow!"

be happy you live where you do.
GregNorc says: You own an X-Box? HAHAHAHA! Funny joke man!
<Moderator><Modhater><Hypocrite><Proud PD Vet><1337>
From: Insane Master Power | Posted: 12/18/2001 6:42:57 PM | Message Detail
I do not believe I have ever seen a topic this good. Ever.
Doing the same action over and over expecting a different result is a sign of insanity. ~ some girl I know
From: GrandCross | Posted: 12/18/2001 7:32:09 PM | Message Detail
*Slowly backs away form fakeplasticmanatree*

You better just run.

And, to the topic, it's just not right. From a mother...that isn't right...
<-infinity> When there is no more room in Hell, the dead will walk the earth...
"I speak what's on my mind, which is why I don't talk very much." - Me
From: RamJetXG | Posted: 12/18/2001 8:03:53 PM | Message Detail
Hmm.Your mom walks up to you and hands you a bunch of porno vids.Whaddaya do?Ya take em of course,its only natural!! </sarcasm>

Yeah,you need to get her to a psychiatrist or something.She might try this crap on your grandkids too O_o
Aero Goat:
From: T H E | Posted: 12/18/2001 8:07:29 PM | Message Detail
I love this topic. *goes sig searching*
"Mount Fiji is some big money boy! Dat **** looked like it wuz tikkulin da moon!"- Clyde Singleton
From: T H E | Posted: 12/18/2001 8:19:54 PM | Message Detail
"I said it would be better if my father just gave the videos to some of his friends at work, but my mom insisted that I had to see them."-Kirri about his pornos
From: kirri | Posted: 12/18/2001 8:34:50 PM | Message Detail
Why do you not go to school? I'm guessing it's because your mom wants to teach you herself and keep you at home.

Not really, the problem is that I would always get into fights at school. I'm of a pretty pacific nature, quite the opposite of the typical idiot who paints pictures of naked people on the school walls or bathrooms or whatever. Maybe that's why the only people I was able to get along with at school without starting fights were girls, like when we had to make teams for science projects or things like that. When I was with guys it was always a flood of curses. Anyway, since there was so much violence I just decided to quit, especially on that day were someone who tried to attack me with a knife threatened to send his gang to "kill me" because I talked to the director about the knife and managed to get him pending expulsion at the end of the year. It was too much so I just called it a day. That was in 1999, and I've not returned to school since. On my own I almost finished my exams and am now prepared to go to college.

Usually I get along very easily with everyone when I play hockey, but that's probably because I play with 30-35 year old men. I get along more easily with men than teenagers.

About my mom, it's nothing really new. It's only when she bought those tapes and all that inspired me to make this topic but she's been saying stuff like that since I was very young. I remember once when I was 12 or 13 she made that long discussion about how men should be careful not to be too "self-centered" during sex and wait for the woman to orgasm before "unloading" or something like that or else "my wife" would be angry and ask for a divorce or something. I mean... I really didn't feel like hearing that. She even told me once how to recognize genitals of women who had already been pregnant or not by drawing incomprehensible sketches on some piece of paper.
From: LeonCHEN | Posted: 12/18/2001 8:38:30 PM | Message Detail
Sitcom material
*submits idea to studios, becomes rich*
As long as I have both of my middle fingers, I could live without vocal cords. - Silverfist
You are a stainless teflon
From: The Steaming Pile | Posted: 12/18/2001 10:35:26 PM | Message Detail
I know some moms that would kill their kids if they find them with p0rn
From: chaos knight | Posted: 12/18/2001 10:53:43 PM | Message Detail
Hehe, funny topic...even though it feels freakishly similar in some ways. My parents were kind of like that a few years ago. I thought that they thought I was gay as well. However, they didn't go nearly as far as your mom did. O_o Most they ever did was offer a Playboy subscription (my brother was using their address for his so I guess they didn't mind another one). Yes, I know we are a ****ed up family, heh. I don't hate my parents though, unlike the creator of this topic. They did let up after a while.
From: paragon | Posted: 12/18/2001 10:55:08 PM | Message Detail
Death Sage: Did it ever occur to you that some people don't like porn, and find it preverted/disgusting? Or perhaps have no use for it, whether they like it or not?

LL lgh b 'M iffrt. lgh b ' LL h m.
When I save up a little money I'm coming over there to kill you -Narco
From: jzorbino the sequel | Posted: 12/18/2001 10:56:51 PM | Message Detail
I am so giving my kids porn.
Official Fuel fan of the CoS - Super Unleaded
From: linklink64 | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:01:50 AM | Message Detail
Especially when she keeps asking me when I will make her a grandmother

maybe someone should point out to his mom that buying him "wanking material" will not help her achieve this goal ^^

quite the opposite actually
Spots yet another n00bie.......... FLAME ON!!!
This post will self destruct in 10, 9, 8, 7, 6,,,,,
From: geddon jr | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:15:05 AM | Message Detail
Polno is goood. I laik polno. Its candy 4 yor eye. Taht is y internet toook off, becos off free polno taht yoo can loook at in da privacey off yor own home withoot having 2 actuallly going out adn seerch 4 places taht have it. Can yoo dig? BanG!
<Goood spelning>Thank you father. Goodbye mother. And to all the children... Congratulations!</Goood spelning>
From: FULLY ERECT PENlS | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:28:06 AM | Message Detail
[This message was deleted by a GameFAQs Moderator]
From: cyper | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:34:30 AM | Message Detail
That is the funniest name I've seen in a while.

P.S. The only thing I can say is, I think kirri should have a serious talk with his parents. Having a mum like that must be pretty damn confining.
"I got modded for asking for a pirated copy of Skee-ball" - TerranRedneck
From: Nowhere Man | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:35:23 AM | Message Detail
heh, he got banned.
Jai Guru Deva Om Seifer87
George Harrison 1943 - 2001 John Lennon 1940-1980 :(
From: Phoenix Firehawk | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:59:42 AM | Message Detail
*adds topic to his new list of "GameFAQs moments", since the old archive was deleted by a glitch*

1)talk to both parents, try to understand why she's doing this, if it really is to encourage you to have children, try saying something like "I'll do it when I find the right girl", mainly just try to reassure her...

2)Move out. If possible, find an apartment near a college, get a part time job to help you financially, because your mother might be willing to pay your tuition, but you will need more money...

I have a few more ideas, but they're somewhat extreme, so I'll post them only if you want to read them...
Let there be moonlight...
From: hobbez the tiger | Posted: 12/19/2001 5:57:33 AM | Message Detail
Lol,lol and lol.Gheez dude,i dont know what to say.My mother would never bought me porn videos and tell me to watch them.
From: tombobobobbob | Posted: 12/19/2001 9:40:59 AM | Message Detail
dude y would u refuse
i wish i had a mum like that
dude that is cool

From: The Steaming Pile | Posted: 12/19/2001 11:25:55 AM | Message Detail
Can asking your child to masturbate be considered a criminal offense?
From: NeverWinter Nights | Posted: 12/19/2001 11:41:36 AM | Message Detail
This is a historic topic if I ever saw one.

NeverWinter Nights- Official NWN fan of the CoS
"There are NO stupid questions. But there are ALOT of inquisitive idiots."
From: Doctor Lecter | Posted: 12/19/2001 11:45:02 AM | Message Detail
You know, this whole topic just sounds like lyrics from a NOFX song or something. Seriously. Purely Fat Mike material.
"The military intelligence, two words combined that can't make sense." - Megadeth
From: Kildread2 | Posted: 12/19/2001 11:55:08 AM | Message Detail
This is hands down the most screwed-up topic I ever read here, and I jsut read the first 10 posts and the last page..

From: monstro city | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:11:05 PM | Message Detail

omg this is SO screwed up!

to all that thinks getting porn from your mom is ok:
you're the ones who need a psychiatrist
*pokes this user with an AK-47*|
From: isv666 | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:32:51 PM | Message Detail
to all that thinks getting porn from your mom is ok:
you're the ones who need a psychiatrist

There's actually nothing really wrong with getting porn from your mom, or dad. It's a completely different story when they are telling you to jerkoff over it.

Hell, I was in 7th grade and snagged a porno mag, my mom found it in my room. She didn't care. She said I could have it... I declined because I felt uneasy with the situation. Then in later years, I asked them to get me an issue of Playboy. The issue which had former WWF star Sable in it. Got it because I wanted to see her naked, and for collectors value.

So maybe my original statement should read, there is nothing wrong if your parents don't care if you have porn, or look at it, but telling them to get off at it... then there is a problem.

And there's a difference between being open sexually with your children and flatout wanting them to **** every woman they can.

I know it's the last day on Earth, we'll be together while the planet dies, I know it's the last day on Earth, we'll never say goodbye.
From: clevergamer | Posted: 12/19/2001 12:49:36 PM | Message Detail
Kildread you must've missed the cat fingering topic somehow...
From: WrestlingRPGfan | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:16:28 PM | Message Detail
'|.......|::;i - ;i'`:,.............,|::|.......|
'|.......'.......'|'i:::`*:~.-~^*': :'|::|.......'`*-,
'|........,.-:^:':'\:'`:;:: :: : : : :: ::;'i::/`':^.,......`'i
'|..,.:':::::::::::'\| '`*^~:-:~^*'..'|/:::::::::'`:^:., |

From: Doctor Lecter | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:18:14 PM | Message Detail
O_O The WHAT topic?!?!?!?!?! O_O
"The military intelligence, two words combined that can't make sense." - Megadeth
From: monstro city | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:30:49 PM | Message Detail
yeah, i saw the cat fingering topic.....

most screwed up topics

1)janaji's cat fingering topic
2)this topic
3)several 1337 topics that don't even come close
*pokes this user with an AK-47*|
From: Dragin Master | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:45:48 PM | Message Detail
Kirri, your Mom may be afraid you're gay. Seriously. Why else would she give you porn all of a sudden? Or she was waiting for a LONG time to give you all this stuff about sex. You can tell your Mom you like Lesbian Sex, if she thinks your gay, that better work!

Talk to your Dad about this, cause this situation is really freaky.

I'll be pissed if this'll get modded. Cause I don't mean to offend anybody. Plus, I just got off from being on Level 5.

This post is NOT to offend anybody!
The *POP* goes to Weasel cause the Weasel goes *POP*!
Now everybody Break-Dance!
From: Dr DeGen | Posted: 12/19/2001 1:46:20 PM | Message Detail
i remember a topic on LUE a while ago...

this guy said he was at his pc looking at Pr0n ..and he said he had him a boner the size of texas...and his cat was in the room...well

later in the post he asked if he was going to go to hell...

and what about the recent one on LUE

the guy who *****ed that dead girl.....

bah, i cant veiw LUE just now..i only know because someone on another board made a topic about it.
Babies are quite cheap on the black market(they come in jars $34.00 shipping) - The Hell Boards
From: Endyfella | Posted: 12/19/2001 2:06:53 PM | Message Detail
kirri???? do you have aim???
Endyfella - One of the FOUR members of ߤ
"To the world you are just a person, but to a person you are the world."
From: kirri | Posted: 12/19/2001 2:10:21 PM | Message Detail
kirri???? do you have aim???

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