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My mother can really piss me off sometimes.....
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From: Endyfella | Posted: 12/19/2001 2:24:14 PM | Message Detail
must you quote me?
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Endyfella - One of the FOUR members of ߤ
"To the world you are just a person, but to a person you are the world."
From: diablosdemonP | Posted: 12/19/2001 2:55:41 PM | Message Detail
must you quote me?

Yes

LOL Sorry
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From: Vash The Stampede | Posted: 12/19/2001 4:00:11 PM | Message Detail
*Bookmarks topic to read later*
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WOWS! YOU ARE SO MUCH KNOWLEDGEABILITY!!!!!!!!!!!!! --- NERV
From: Stacy Keibler | Posted: 12/19/2001 7:45:31 PM | Message Detail
Dude, you're mom has some serious issues.

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Stacy Keibler
The Duchess of Dudleyville
From: Merlin the Tuna | Posted: 12/19/2001 10:02:58 PM | Message Detail
I've said it before, I'll say it again.

<Smiles>
<Nods>
<Backs away>
<Smiles>
<Nods>
<Backs away>
<Smiles>
<Nods>
<Backs away>
<Smiles>
<Nods>
<Backs away>
<Smiles>
<Nods>
<Backs away>
_
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The cross is broken. God is dead. I want my mommy.
From: kirri | Posted: 12/19/2001 10:03:31 PM | Message Detail
I wonder how people would like to have a mother like that
From: jzorbino the sequel | Posted: 12/19/2001 10:20:52 PM | Message Detail
Now I wanna go look at some porn...
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Official Fuel fan of the CoS - Super Unleaded
From: Jihad | Posted: 12/19/2001 10:26:05 PM | Message Detail
.^*''|'\..........,.^*''`*^,...,/|'`*^-,
'|.......'|::\......,'.....,.:*:,......'`i:'|.......|
'|.......'|:::|.....;.......':,:::,:.......';:|.......|
'|.......|::;i - ;i'`:,.............,|::|.......|
'|.......'.......'|'i:::`*:~.-~^*': :'|::|.......'`*-,
'|........,.-:^:':'\:'`:;:: :: : : : :: ::;'i::/`':^.,......`'i
'|..,.:':::::::::::'\| '`*^~:-:~^*'..'|/:::::::::'`:^:., |
':;:::::::::;:-^*'.....................`'*^:;-.....:;'
....`;:'........................................'`^:;
From: kirri | Posted: 12/19/2001 11:40:09 PM | Message Detail
Don't back off too much or you'll fall from the cliff!
From: Void of Genocide | Posted: 12/20/2001 1:33:12 AM | Message Detail
Damn! Great topic this one! Bump often for the next generations! I can swear this topic has got me horny!

Well, I already have a girlfriend and we have a wonderful relationship, but back in the days before I met her, had my mother (or anyone else) given me money to hire a prostitute (And I mean a good prostitute, not those virus infested messes of the streets) gods! I swear I would have gone for it!

But of course, my mom would NEVER do such a thing.

Some people are a bit too exaggerated when it comes down to porn. Hell, I've seen naked women since the tender age of eight (Without my parents finding out) and it's the most normal of things. There is nothing more beautiful than the naked body of a beautiful woman! (Yeah, I'm an artist!) Then again, someone here mentioned an interesting point; that of some people not being able to stand porn for it being grotesque or obscene. (Their point of view)

But anyway, you should really avoid your mom's bizarre behavior. Your mother hanging you some porn, well, I see the educational value of it, (Hey, my parents were very open when it came down to sex. Ha! My father even bought me some porno magazines) but forcing you to "make her a grandmother" is just plain sick, specially with that poor french girl (Oh, I love French women!) gods! She was too young then!

LOL, the world these days is crazy!

VoG.

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Calling the USA "America" is as stupid as calling Germany "Europe"
From: Gen2000 | Posted: 12/20/2001 2:35:28 AM | Message Detail
Wow, this has been a very "different from the avearge topics" topic indeed.

On topic though, I think most people are missing the point here about it, although I found alot of quotes here very funny. It isn't the fact that his mom gave him porn, but the fact that she is actually telling him to beat off to and stuff. I mean, yes, most moms wants to be a grandmother and all that and wants to make sure you like girls and stuff, but the way she is getting her word across to you is not cool at all. I mean at age 12, she is giving you lessons on how to please a woman...I mean geez, I heard about the Birds and Bees chat, but she is taking it to the next level, lol. Drawing diagrams? Wtf? Think another problem is that is that you are in home school too and she wants make sure you don't turn out weird or a psycho or something, even though your mom is seeming kinda weird herself.

The best thing you could do is either try to seriously talk to your mom, it don't really seem like you are trying, but instead trying to see the replies on this topic instead, or go out and try to get help from somewhere else.

Mom giving porn to her child = cool.

Mom giving porn to child and telling him to beat off = NOT cool. I'm out.
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From: Link The Hylian | Posted: 12/20/2001 2:43:34 AM | Message Detail
sell the videos on ebay.
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"If thou hast a strong desire or dream, wish for it..." The Triforce
From: Link The Hylian | Posted: 12/20/2001 2:43:51 AM | Message Detail
then sell you mom on ebay.
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"If thou hast a strong desire or dream, wish for it..." The Triforce
From: Void of Genocide | Posted: 12/20/2001 2:56:14 AM | Message Detail
If prostitutes could be hired via the internet, I bet my ass his mother would hire him one.

VoG.

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Calling the USA "America" is as stupid as calling Germany "Europe"
From: Dr DeGen | Posted: 12/20/2001 12:36:10 PM | Message Detail
bump
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Babies are quite cheap on the black market(they come in jars $34.00 shipping)
rhn.skwerl.net/boards - The Hell Boards
From: chris2001 | Posted: 12/20/2001 12:46:35 PM | Message Detail
Best. Topic. Ever.
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,.-'Hϊ'-.,
"lol, i think that is the MOST SUPIDEST post ive seen" - linklink64
From: Melissamaya | Posted: 12/20/2001 12:48:29 PM | Message Detail
Oh die, topic, just die.
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I'm a sex machine. Turn me on
<Level 69: <Mod-Romancer> >*Quake/FF Fan*
From: Death is coming | Posted: 12/20/2001 12:53:16 PM | Message Detail
Masturbation is like procrastination next thing you know your ****ing yourself.
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"Legalizxation for MARAWANA~XSIN "
I think someone has been smoking to much if you ask me...
From: genocide | Posted: 12/20/2001 1:00:33 PM | Message Detail
my mom would kill me .

go out and get one of those shcoolgirl sluts.

your a lucky man.
now you can bang women in your house!!

most guys can't
arg
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--
for the cops, the evidence will vanish in a puff of smoke...(the squeeze ,gangstarr)/{OSMBV)
From: The Steaming Pile | Posted: 12/20/2001 3:41:36 PM | Message Detail
Getting porn from your mom is like having sex with your little brother.
From: kirri | Posted: 12/20/2001 4:30:37 PM | Message Detail
I don't think there are much similarities..........
From: radiantheart | Posted: 12/20/2001 4:48:55 PM | Message Detail
O_o;;

.....my Mom just read this topic.
She agrees that your Mom needs some mental help.

< runs far away, never to return >
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...suddenly a void opens, and the ultimate evil steps out.
Rahea: "Hiya!"
~Tyzus
From: HellDeathScythe | Posted: 12/20/2001 7:45:41 PM | Message Detail

BEST. TOPIC. EVER.

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Worst. Signature. Ever.
From: Bad Omen | Posted: 12/20/2001 7:48:48 PM | Message Detail
o_O;;

That's some wicked **** right there, even by my standards....

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Don't you think that you need somebody, don't you think that you need someone....
Everybody needs somebody.... You're not the only one....
From: LeonCHEN | Posted: 12/20/2001 7:51:10 PM | Message Detail
I could imagine selling moms on ebay:

Description: Dark brown hair and eyes, stubby figure, likes to distribute porn to their son. A GOOD DEAL! GET HER NOW!

Bids: 1052
Current bid: 89 million
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As long as I have both of my middle fingers, I could live without vocal cords. - Silverfist
You are a stainless teflon
From: phileve | Posted: 12/20/2001 8:02:54 PM | Message Detail
Forgive me if I'm taking this too far, but exactly how much porn could you buy yourself for $89, 000, 000 ?
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"This earnestness can't last forever. Can it?"
AIM: phileveEatsCurry
From: HammerSuit | Posted: 12/20/2001 8:06:49 PM | Message Detail
That $89 billion isn't neede to buy lots of porn, but just look at the $89 billion as a "porn license"...

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"Yes, you can too play Russian Roulette with an automatic. Watch!" -Lazyhound on "What will your last words be?".
From: kirri | Posted: 12/20/2001 9:57:59 PM | Message Detail
Lol
From: Tha2000 | Posted: 12/20/2001 10:09:18 PM | Message Detail
I am very scared. Run far little kirri!

Freakish. Watch the porn and look at... erm... never mind.
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Um...-Me being asked a question
From: UltimaZER0 | Posted: 12/20/2001 10:28:22 PM | Message Detail
Ok seriously, something if awfully strange when your mom offers you free porn. Isn't the main goal to hide porn away from any parents? Strange. Just strange.

So uh...

...you got a selling account on Ebay by any chance?

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[ZER0]
"Nimuryu Kanryo" - "Mission complete"
From: MJK | Posted: 12/20/2001 10:54:58 PM | Message Detail
i hate to say this, but 3 words:
Shild Protective services. You nedd adoption, emancipation, or a hammer to beat your mom over the head with.
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I got it! I got it! I-
-Mogg, Last words
From: Spiffy Magoo | Posted: 12/20/2001 11:45:30 PM | Message Detail
0_0 It's been said before, but I must say it again...

BEST. TOPIC. EVER!
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"WWFE Encourages Use of Common Sense-Headline for a news post on wwfparents.com
From: SystMis HAP | Posted: 12/20/2001 11:51:30 PM | Message Detail
ehh... damn, kirri, what is up with your mom? is she a nympho or something? O.o;;

sorry... but a mother giving her son money for a prostitute just shouldn't happen, nope nope.
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Nostalgia:
Faded clouds & metal horizons deteriorate into a dream I might have had one sullen night.
From: Heavens Assasin | Posted: 12/20/2001 11:57:50 PM | Message Detail
Indeed!

|3357 70|>1C 3\/3|2!!!!!!111

BEST TOPIC EVER!!!!!!!
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http://cgi.gamefaqs.com/boards/gentopic.asp?board=22703
Ssshhhhh, my secwet boawd!
From: kirri | Posted: 12/21/2001 12:56:13 AM | Message Detail
Oh and you're probably not going to believe it, but when I was about 15, my mother asked me "what was happening to my *****" right in front of my father. She was laughing and all and made comments as how I should have a lot of hair by now and stuff. My father was not really happy with that
From: Masao Kishin | Posted: 12/21/2001 1:05:26 AM | Message Detail
Oh and you're probably not going to believe it, but when I was about 15, my mother asked me "what was happening to my *****" right in front of my father. She was laughing and all and made comments as how I should have a lot of hair by now and stuff. My father was not really happy with that

What... the... ???????

Man... what's... wrong... with... your... mother...?

0_0

Oh man...
From: Phoenix Firehawk | Posted: 12/21/2001 1:08:31 AM | Message Detail
O_o
...
o_O
...

I still think that you should move out as soon as possible...
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Let there be moonlight...
From: DX Homey | Posted: 12/21/2001 1:25:56 AM | Message Detail
Get a gun...... I don't care how you get one. But GET ONE!
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~~__.:I'm Ugly and Im Proud!:.__~~
Proud leader of the Self Esteem Club
From: cyper | Posted: 12/21/2001 2:07:49 AM | Message Detail
Christ...mas.
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"I got modded for asking for a pirated copy of Skee-ball" - TerranRedneck
From: Masamune2 | Posted: 12/21/2001 4:15:08 AM | Message Detail
Oh and you're probably not going to believe it, but when I was about 15, my mother asked me "what was happening to my *****" right in front of my father. She was laughing and all and made comments as how I should have a lot of hair by now and stuff. My father was not really happy with that

O_O
Horribly disturbing.

Just when we think we've heard the whole story you go and tell us something that will scare us even more...
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"Uh-oh, I think I swallowed a dog food lid..."-Bart Simpson
From: Forest Mercenary | Posted: 12/21/2001 4:32:55 AM | Message Detail
Heh, this tops the cat fingering topic.
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"Getting porn from your mom is like having sex with your little brother."~The Steaming Pile
From: Jar Jar Binks | Posted: 12/21/2001 5:09:31 AM | Message Detail
I think she wants to sleep with you. Honestly I do. Overall, she arouses me very much.
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For teenagers, be an ass to them, and they're yours until you cheat on them. Then, they're yours forever. - xXvegetto2Xx, on getting girls
<CHA><BTJ>
From: rekenner | Posted: 12/21/2001 7:04:00 AM | Message Detail
I bring up the most disturbing though of all...
What's going to be his Christmas gift from his mom?

(BTW...This is the best CE topic ever... the guy who did a cat is the best from LUE and CE)
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The net's funniest! 8-bit Theater!
http://www.nuklearpower.com/comic/001.htm
From: Tha2000 | Posted: 12/21/2001 9:30:38 AM | Message Detail
I want this topic to live!

*bump*
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Um...-Me being asked a question
From: XPinion | Posted: 12/21/2001 9:45:19 AM | Message Detail
Kind of scary..LOL.
From: RamJetXG | Posted: 12/21/2001 10:13:17 AM | Message Detail
Forget Christmas,what about his B-Day?And graduation???(Assuming he is going to his school's ceremony)

O_o
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Aero Goat:
From: Omasitor Hain | Posted: 12/21/2001 10:14:15 AM | Message Detail
If she was my mother, I'd put my head in the toilet and drown myself.
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"If life tosses you a hand grenade, blow something up."
From: ribald | Posted: 12/21/2001 10:20:38 AM | Message Detail
"BTW...This is the best CE topic ever... the guy who did a cat is the best from LUE and CE"-can you give a link to this topic i couldnt find it.
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"Can yoo dig? BanG!"geddon jrs trade mark
From: Lorelai | Posted: 12/21/2001 10:26:43 AM | Message Detail
The cat fingering topic was modded, sometime after it reached several pages. I do not have it saved. Ask around, someone probably has.

~~ The heart has its secret currents deep and without guide ~~
~~ to find out where they will lead I take the plunge eyes wide ~~
From: Gleepo | Posted: 12/21/2001 10:28:08 AM | Message Detail
200th! Maybe i'll bother reading the thread now.
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Current looking for a quote. Check back later. That is all.
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